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The giver (for Berdis) by James Baldwin

1 If the hope of giving

2 is to love the living,

3 the giver risks madness

4 in the act of giving.

5 Some such lesson I seemed to see

6 in the faces that surrounded me.

7 Needy and blind, unhopeful, unlifted,

8 what gift would give them the gift to be gifted?

9 The giver is no less adrift

10 than those who are clamouring for the gift.

11 If they cannot claim it, if it is not there,

12 if their empty fingers beat the empty air

13 and the giver goes down on his knees in prayer

14 knows that all of his giving has been for naught

15 and that nothing was ever what he thought

16 and turns in his guilty bed to stare

17 at the starving multitudes standing there

18 and rises from bed to curse at heaven,

19 he must yet understand that to whom much is given

20 much will be taken, and justly so:

21 I cannot tell how much I owe.